Kelly Clarkson
Because of Youu


I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself
Cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did,
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way
To never let it get that far



Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid



I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because you know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with



Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid



I watched you die
I heard you cry every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry in the middle of the night
For the same damn thing



Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid



Because of you
Because of you

quick recap on last friday outing...a night out with my darlings...vivien, jac, sarah and glenda plus 3 other guys...hahaha....



met with alison for dinner..headed down to cineleisure for pasta mania, jac joined us shortly....chatted till 11 plus...waited for vivien to end her work....woo...she looked tired...so does me and jac....hahah....alison went home....



accompanied vivien to have her dinner at 12 plus...woo...dinner for her, supper for the both of us....thanks vivien for the lovely treat of the chocolate moouse..haha....at TCC...


-thanks vivien for the lovely treat...love ya....! -



after that, headed down to P.S at around 1.30...met up with sarah and glenda and their 3 other friends for a mid night movie...


- Dragon Squad -



yes yes...joke of the day....honey collected the wrong movie tickets...she collected Harry Potter and the Globet of Fire Movie...lolx....darn pai seh tat time....yes, in the end, we managed to watch wad we bought....the show not too bad.... i just falling in love with SHAWN YUE...lolx....he's darn cute and cool!!....kept practicing his drifting in the movie, just like Initial D?? haha...



show finished at 4 plus....hungry....before we headed down to somewhere for supper....haha..this is wad the girls did in the toilet.......




- m ii and jac -



you'll see the tireness in us.....

- tat's vivien -

- tat's m ii -

- sarah -

- the c.ks ang mo lian: jac -



we are still not done with our foto taking yet....haha...group picx.....hahax...

- no matter wad happens, youu will always be my honey :D -

- the sweetie pies -

- m ii and sarah -




- kewl -


- dun ever mess with us -

- last pic of the day, me, vivien and sarah -



after that, headed down to Geylang for some Dao Huay...keke....nice nice....ate and chatted till 5 plus 6 am...ready to sing the national anthem...hahax....darn tired.....slept till 11 plus...hehe....yes yes....so yea...tats a night out....the first healthy night out with the darlings....usually we will go clubbing but not that nite....



looking forward for this friday....Vivien's early celebration of her birthday at MoMO...yesyes....i'll be there manx...keke.. party time for the last time before mugging for exams......




gotta a friend of mine just broke up with his girl....went not even one week...was sad...he was sad..definately...but it's part and parcel of life i guess..coming together and separating the next moment....tats what i learnt those few years...if she's meant to be youurs, she will come back to ya...if she's not meant to be yours, she wont be either... forcing her to stay by your side, wont do any good for youu and her...it will only make the both parties miserable...why go through that hardship? tats what i learnt too....



it ain't wrong to cry...why not? but after crying, pick urself up again...get on with life, in this world, there isnt anyone that you need to live for....live for yourself, dun have to depend on the other person to continue living....no one in this world is indispensible...life still goes on, the world is still spinning 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.....remember, live for yourself....
if a girl can do that, why not youu right? at least, ending it fast rather than dragging it, it will only prolong the pain...



now separated, remember the memories that youu had with her, memories is only thing you have now...treasure it, keep it safe somewhere in your heart....think about the happy times you've shared with her, and not the bad....it will be sweeter and lovelier... if she can let go just like that, why not youu, u can too..its just that humans are stubborn, agree with joe...sometimes stubborness can lead to endless pain...



if she can let go, u can too...



to end this long entry for today :
memories are there for youu to remember to make youu smile and not to make youu cry....

17 November 2005, Thursday



school as usual on that day, BORED.....yea....

nothin to write really,
this is wad we doin in class when we are super BORED!!


our ck sister

- his new pet -

- new lover?? -

- our 4ever emo sister -



the 3 bored little piggies...


- plus one sister -

- the future detectives?? -

shall have a post for today...


just came back from movie with zu jia and tai tien....Harry Potter and the Globet of Fire...yea...not too bad the show...quite liked it..maybe cuz been catching every episode of Harry Potter without fail each year....so been following the story...


life, rather dull..not much difference though...been the same everyday...to school, back from school.....doing things aimlessly which i noe i should be stopping doing those things already...


i aint young anymore, can't have an aimless life, its time to move on, abbie.... no point being stuck here...


sometimes i find, me around or without me around...it doesnt make any difference in that someone's life, cuz there will always be another person will be there for him..... so, i aint that important which i tot i was in the past... its time for abbie to learn to live without that someone anymore but being independant again....


for you, youu can never break off all ties with her no matter how hard am i....u can never cut off all friendship and contacts with her no matter how important i am to u, or am i important to anyone in the first place or people just take me for granted?


if i can't control my emotions anymore, i can't swollow it down any longer, i'll have no other way out but to let go....


i guessed im really drained out emotionally and physically this time round....i knew very long ago what it feels to feel the numbness of the heart, where the wound is too painful for one to bear, no one can share to the pain but myself, in the end, one wont feel anything anymore, i did really felt that numbness in my heart recently again....


suddenly, abbie is feeling really emotionally down again....haix....useless abbie....sigh.....


wish i could suffer from a bad amnesia.....

feel like blogging something...have alot to say but just can't write my thoughts down


guess its all in a mess right now, not organised, tats why i can't write what i wanna say...


all i know is i have my limits to certain things too...dun push your luck too far...
i'm really tired of battling everyday with some bitches out there...


sometimes, even if one has said the same things thousand and one time, but things still doesnt change..why does it happen?

think about it....


to me, is the other party not willing to do anything or give up anything...but one can't have both worlds...it will be either one...


either she get out of ur life or it will be me........

finally changed a bloggie skin that i can use..hope wont give me anymore problems...but i still feel heart pain abandoning the bloggie that had been with me for the past 1 plus years...hmmx...will not delete it bah...but leave it as a white elephant...hahax....



really can't bear to click the delete button for my old bloggie...if not, memories will not be there for me to read anytime i want...memories are left for me to hold and go through with my life... in life, one can't have both worlds in their hands...one can only choose one and sacrifice the other...


if someone were to ask you to choose one, sacrifice one of them, who will choose? who will you sacrifice?



abbie is emotionally down recently, yea...maybe i just can't let go which i should when there's there i can do or you wanna change it either.....i'm willing to do something, but will you or u can't bear to do it?



or am i the one being sacrificed to get hurt again but not others....